Posted by: mylittlesnow | April 29, 2008

Jokes from my mailbox – A quick laugh

I guess most of us will receive a lot of forwarded emails from time to time. I was thinking, why not post it up here for everyone to read (if there are ppl actually reading my blog la, hehe). So i’ll start to post jokes received @ my mailbox from time to time. Hope you guys will enjoy reading it as a way to relax and loosen up after a tiring day at work… 🙂

Teacher   : History is a very interesting subject. It tells you about what had happened in the past.
Student   : Please teacher, I don’t think I want to study history.
Teacher   : Why?
Student   : There is no future in it.
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… .

Teacher   : Ted, if your father has $10 and you ask him for $6, how much would your father still have?
Ted         : $10.
Teacher   : You don’t know maths.
Ted         : You don’t know my father!
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……..

Mother    : David, come here.
David      : Yes, mum?
Mother    : You really disappoint me. Your results are getting worse.
David      : But I will only get my report book tomorrow.
Mother    : I know that. But I am going to Hong Kong tomorrow, so I am scolding you now.
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……..

Father     : Why did you fail your mathematics test?
Son         : On Monday, teacher said 3+5=8
Father     : So?
Son         : On Tuesday, she said 4+4=8, on Wednesday, she said 6+2=8. If she can’t make up her mind, how do I know the right answer?
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……..

A mother and son were doing dishes while the father and daughter were watching TV in the living room. Suddenly, there was a loud crash of breaking plates, then complete silence. The daughter turned to look at her father.

Daughter : It’s mummy!
Father     : How do you know?
Daughter : She didn’t say anything.
………… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……… ……..

Girl         : Do you love me?
Boy         : Yes Dear
Girl         : Would you die for me?
Boy         : No, mine is undying love

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —

Man        : How old is your father?
Boy         : As old as me
Man        : How can that be?
Boy         : He became a father only when I was born

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —

Waiter    : I’ve stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog’s leg.
Customer: Don’t tell me your problems. Give me the menu card.

———— ——— ——— ——— —

Teacher   : Simon, your composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your brother’s. Did u copy his?
Simon      : No, teacher, it’s the same dog!

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —

Father     : Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son       : That’s why I say she’s no good!

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —

Teacher   : ‘Where were u born?’
Student   : ‘Singapore, Sir.’
Teacher   : ‘Which part?’
Student   : ‘All of me, Sir.’
———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-
A teacher was asking her class: ‘What is the difference between ‘unlawful’ and ‘illegal’?’ Only one hand shot up. ‘Ok, answer, Joan’ said the teacher. ”unlawful’ is when u do something the law doesn’t allow and ‘illegal’ is a sick eagle.’

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —
Teacher   : ‘How come you do not comb your hair?’
Ah Kow    : ‘No comb, Sir.’
Teacher   : ‘Use your dad’s then.’
Ah Kow    : ‘No hair, Sir.’

———— ——— ——— ——— ——— —-

A boy came home from school with his exam results.
‘What did u get?’ asked his father.
‘My marks are under water,’ said the boy.
‘What do u mean ‘under water’?’
‘They are all below ‘C’ (sea) level’  

 

 

 

 

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